4 June 1999

THE EXPECTED CRAP: Here we go. Reuters' Bob Tourtellotte proposes the absurdity that "the big question in all the hype leading up to Star Wars: Episode I -- The Phantom Menace was not whether it would be a box office hit or miss, but whether it would beat the $1.8 billion Titanic as the top grossing movie of all time." BULL!!!! Stop it! Only an IDIOT would figure Star Wars to beat Titanic, now, before the movie opened or ever! This is a silly issue created by silly people who need something to write about. The Phantom Menace's run has been stupendous and it looks every bit likely to be near or over the $400 million mark domestically. It may actually drop, in its third weekend, to a number near the highest weekend Titanic ever managed. These are not comparable animals. And all this searching for a way to make Star Wars a whipping boy continues to embarrass me for this entire profession.

GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY: Still stuck in L.A., but if I'm gonna live and die here, doing it with William Friedkin actually in the room is a pretty cool way for a movie-lover to go. L.A.'s American Cinematheque will screen The French Connection tonight at 7 p.m. with a post-showing conversation with Friedkin. Then, they'll throw up a restored 35 mm copy of The Boys In The Band. On Saturday, Friedkin documentaries The Thin Blue Line and The Bold Men start at 4 p.m. At 6:30, it's The Exorcist, with Friedkin turning up afterwards for a chat. Then, The French Connection shows again at 9:45 p.m. Sunday, Friedkin rests, but the screenings go on, with The Birthday Party, Good Times and The Night They Raided Minsky's all showing. (I'll be resting on Sunday, too. Actually, not, as I will be at Words Into Pictures - for the second glorious day. Another great opportunity this weekend in L.A.)

JUST WONDERING: Did you send in your additions to the list of great young actresses? So far, Christina Ricci, Clea DuVall & Allyson Hannigan (the Eve Arden group) and Ashley Judd are the adds that I agree with. And I am personally embarrassed that I left Kirsten Dunst off the list. She has a real shot at being an important actress for years to come. And Dick is now on my list of potential sleepers. There's a lot of support for Natalie Portman and Leelee Sobieski to move up in my estimation. And the usual derision of Drew Barrymore, who is just too popular.

QUOTE WHORING USA: For Instinct: "You'll Feel Like A Monkey If You Don't See This One!" You'll Go Ape For Instinct!" "You'll Laugh, You'll Cry, You'll Leave The Theater Really Quickly."

HAPPY TRAILERS TO YOU: Because there are almost no movies to go and see, I once again am trailer info light. I did get a letter form one reader who saw Star Wars this weekend and the tease for The Beach was still there. Maybe Fox only pulled the poor thing at the Chinese, where booing was publicly reported. Anyway, I'll give the space to Krillian today: "I had no problem with the previews before Star Wars. We didn't get The Beach preview. We got Austin Powers, Fight Club, Anna and the King, and Titan A.E. I would rather have eight previews than to have to sit through the 2-3 commercials before the previews that is seeming to be a tradition now. I go to movies so I don't have to watch commercials. For every commercial they put before a movie, we should get $1 off. I am sick of Coke's stand-up comedy commercials. They are not funny the first time, let alone the ninth time. I didn't pay $7 to see a Durango commercial; I don't care about Honda Civics when I'm in a darkened theater. It's bad enough they have commercials on video.

Now if there are previews, great. Sometimes they're the best part of going to movies. Let me see previews for The Haunting and Bowfinger again. Someone show me Mystery Men and Deep Blue Sea when I go to see The 13th Floor this weekend. Previews help me decide how bad I want to see a movie. I was excited for Snake Eyes until I saw the preview and it showed me who the villain was. I have since heard it was a horrible movie whether you knew the ending or not. Or Goodbye Lover. I teetered on it until I saw the preview which told me I'd rather hit my hand with a hammer repeatedly than sit through that movie.

BAD AD WATCH: I teased Notting Hill and Universal for its reaching claim of being "the best romantic comedy opening ever." Now, the ad says "America's #1" in huge print, "Comedy Romance Movie" is mid-sized print and "With Critics" in weird, tiny flat print. What up with that? The film is America's #1 comedy. Wasn't that enough? (And isn't that much better English than "America's #1 Comedy Romance Movie?") And the critics reviews are right there to peruse. I think someone had too much coffee Tuesday morning over in the valley.

READER OF THE DAY: This came from Aaron: "A few sentences into Thursday's column, I had to double check the Web address to see if I had been redirected to the Hot Button by Matt Drudge. But it wasn't the "backstabbing, philosophy-free" blah blah blah remarks. You're right, we already knew that. And though my brow furrowed in confusion at the remarks charging the media with rationalizing Monica-gate, it wasn't until I read that Bill Clinton hasn't gotten "in the way of the natural economic growth curve coming from a new economic era," that my jaw hit the keyboard. I was certain that all laws of capitalistic economics had been suspended, and that Clinton had orchestrated the bullish economy. Anyway, way to alienate the mainstream media! Unfortunately, I can't help but think that sometime soon I'll be reading the Hot Button by David Poland on the Fox News Network Website."

E ME: As I wrote to Aaron, I'm not quite sure whether he was insulting or complimenting me. But I like that. Intelligent conversation and ambiguity naturally go hand in hand. (Not that I don't have my seriously dogmatic moments.) Can we have some serious minded letters about what is so appealing about reporting the process of filmmaking before it's complete and why you think it is or is not a problem?