NEWS BY
THE NUMBERS
Welcome to an XXL edition
of The Hot Button. I'll be back on Tuesday with a round-up of
the weekend. Until then, be safe and have fun. And to our non-American
readers, nyah-nyah-nah-nyah-nyah! We're having barbecues and fireworks
all weekend, and it won't even bother us that we're invading the sovereignty
of another nation as we celebrate. Don't you wish you were us?
10. Lost
Dream: Dreamworks officially withdrew plans to build a studio
in Playa Vista after four years of ranting, wrangling and one hunger
strike by an activist that ended in his death. They fought, they won,
they left. How Hollywood.
9. Watching
Others Watch Others: Young Jeffrey Wells of Mr.
Showbiz has been quite busy these days. A couple comments on a couple
of his stories. First, the Star Trek turnover story isn't exactly breaking
news. If you want to know what is scaring Paramount, it's not the lagging
grosses. The numbers have been pretty consistent. Only Star Trek:
The Motion Picture (the first), Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home
(the whale one) and Star Trek VIII: First Contact (the Borg one)
have broken the $80 million mark domestically. Numbers II, III, VI,
VII and IX were all in the $70s of millions. And only Star Trek V:
The Final Frontier fell below $70 million domestic with $52 million.
(Interestingly, Star Trek is a series that does not do particularly
well overseas, taking in totals that are regularly a little better than
half the domestic total.) In the original series, Paramount had to deal
with age and the high-priced egos of William Shatner and Leonard
Nimoy. Now, Paramount has to deal with Patrick Stewart and
Jonathan Frakes, who has filled the role of the demanding Nimoy
to a "t." Stewart is even more anxious to separate form the Star Trek
series than Shatner ever was. (Stewart has a thriving movie career.
Shatner had "TJ Hooker".) When Stewart didn't show up for the Star Trek
30th Anniversary Celebration a couple of years ago, I was told confidentially,
by an impeccable source, that Stewart had no conflicts keeping him from
attending as claimed, except for the conflict of his ego and his embarrassment
about being tied to this too-coarse-for-him phenomena of a series. And
don't underestimate the importance of Frakes here. For a while, with
the original crew, you couldn't get a film made without giving some
actor a directing gig. But they finally fell back to Nicholas Meyer,
who was a respectable and previously successful alternative. Who can
the TNG crew turn back to? David Berman, who directed ST: Generations?
He's made one until-now unreleased film since his debut with that film.
Frakes isn't stepping aside for him. As they did with the transition
from the original cast to the TNG cast, Paramount will pay through the
nose for the transitional movie. In the meantime, what they really need
is a TV show that can really fly to drive the whole enterprise (if you'll
excuse the pun).
In other Wellsian news, I
think I should point out that the story about the "laughable" Nic
Cage photos in the Superman suit may well be an apocryphal tale.
The fact that the photos haven't leaked out a year later suggests it
is. I find Nic Cage an odd choice as Superman too (he'd make
a great Iron Man), but I won't damn the whole enterprise based on a
rumor and a pissed off Kevin Smith. I should also point out that
while I disagree that the buzz on Wild Wild West is as bad as
Waterworld or Last Action Hero, both of those films ended
up turning a profit. That trick may be a lot harder to turn for WWW.
About Anna & The King, the budget had gone over the $100 million
mark before the crew left for Malaysia. Andy Tennant is not much
of a director, but he's not a profligate spender or shooter either.
And single sources for praise or dismissal of a film as "working" or
"not working" are worth about as much as you pay for Jeff or my columns.
American Beauty and The Talented Mr. Ripley deserve more
than an early trip to the unsubstantiated rumor mill.
8. Show
Me The Gator!: The third stupidest controversy of the week
is over the premiere of Lake Placid, held at Gator World in Florida.
At the event, alligators were put in bow ties and top hats and had their
mouths kept shut by rubber bands so they wouldn't eat Bridget Fonda
when she quite gamely held them for photos. (They'd probably have to
tie me up too were she holding me in her arms.) Lunatics from People
for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (not all members are as whacked
as others) complained that the reptiles were traumatized by their limo
rides and the flashes from the photographers. Said PETA spokesperson
Jennifer O'Connor, "Using them as props for a movie premiere
is just unacceptable." What kind of way is that for someone to speak
about Ms. Fonda's buns?! Oooooh! She meant the alligators. Uh, Jen,
I hate to be the one to tell you, but these alligators wrestle for a
living. I don't think the limo ride was that bad. Gutting them and wearing
them as slippers to promote the movie would have been bad. This was
nothing. Nothing! Of course, many critics are likely to be as hard to
please as Ms. O'Connor. (Hint, guys: It's only a movie. It knows it's
goofy. Try to relax and see if you can enjoy anything anymore.) So,
you want to see the abuse of the poor, sad little gators. . And ask
youself as you look at them, who is taking the bigger chance, Bridget
or the gators?
7. X
Men, Women & Others: Many of you seem to want to know what
I think of the X-Men casting. Here we go: Dougray Scott
may end up having the chops for Wolverine, but my guess is that he got
the role because he's a member of the Fox family who was willing to
work for almost nothing, in movie star terms. I think Patrick Stewart
is too obvious for Professor Xavier. All I can say is, it's a good thing
that Yul Brynner isn't alive. I think Stewart is a fine actor,
but calm isn't his thing. You can always see the turmoil on Stewart's
face. That's why he is such a good Captain Piccard. I haven't read the
script, so I don't know if Sir Ian McKellen really fits Singer's
Magneto. Again, I would prefer an actor who's had a little less scenery
in his mouth lately, but he will most likely pull it off brilliantly.
I love Halle Berry, and I love looking at Halle Berry,
but what was wrong with her in Bulworth (you never believed she
could really hurt someone) is why she's wrong for Storm. She is a lover,
not a fighter. Again, maybe the script will have her reluctance to fight
as a primary part of her character. I don't know. Anna Paquin
is a brilliant choice for Rogue. She is the best choice of all the young
women out there. Plenty of rage and not too old (sorry, Sarah Polley).
Do I have to say anything about Rebecca Romjin-Stamos as Mystique?
Can you say, "Turn up the air conditioner! Rebecca and her skin-tight
suit have a shot to do and we have to outdo Jeri Ryan without
using implants! No, don't bother with a mic, we'll dub her with Glenn
Close's voice later." I think that Thomas Jane should, and
will, get Gambit. He is perfect for the role. He has exactly the right
"guy who lives down by the beach" lazy charm and look for the role.
And I think the role will make him a star, which a lot of people have
been trying to make him for a couple of years now (next up, Deep
Blue Sea). And, except for that muscle-bound Sabertooth guy, that's
it for now.
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