1 March 2001

MY LAWYERS WILL BE BACK: How long did you think it would take for a counter-offensive against John Connelly's Premiere piece on Arnold Schwarzenegger to occur? About two weeks is the answer. Jamie Lee Curtis, Jim Cameron, Linda Hamilton (who has plenty of motivation not to side with Cameron), the producer of one of the British morning shows where Connelly suggested that things were out of hand, and Arnold Kopelson all have come to the aid of Ah-nuld. The specifics are spotty. JLC claims that there is political motivation behind the piece. I don't believe that for a second. Politics is the excuse that many e-journalists are using to explain why the hatchet job was appropriate. Circulation was clearly the motive. Cameron and Hamilton both speak to a specific incident noted in the piece, inside a limo, during which Schwarzenegger supposedly groped Hamilton under her shirt in front of Cameron, with whom she was living at the time. How many witnesses in a limo? What real source would expose themselves like that? Likely answer: none. Likely reality: an apocryphal tale springing from a limo driver who re-interpreted the physicality which Schwarzenegger has always exhibited in public. That physicality may often cross people's personal boundaries, but isn't it odd that none of the other incidents, like the frisky appearance on The Big Breakfast show, which had lots of witnesses, don’t begin to claim to have gone that far? And Kopelson, who speaks specifically to an accusation that Ah-nuld got a hummer in the trailer to match his Hummer in the parking lot? Who knows? If I had a hundred dollar bill for every story about a star getting caught in the act on a set that I've been told in confidence, I could retire to Bali. For me, it comes back to the same thing I wrote about this weeks ago… what was the point of any of this? Premiere could do a story every single month about nasty stories surrounding movie stars who get paid $10 million a picture and up and not run out for a couple of years. I believe they did it because they felt it was now safe, because The 6th Day stiffed domestically. (I have no idea what it's doing overseas.) Is the Kevin Costner piece next? What about Stallone? Demi Moore anyone? Frankly, I hope not. The new Premiere is promising and the staff over there is capable of doing a lot better than taking cheap shots at declining names… even if the shots are true.

6 REASONS I'M NOT JOINING JEFF WELLS IN PUSHING FOR JOURNALISTS TO TRY AND TO SKEW THE BEST DIRECTOR RACE:

I don't believe in it when Miramax is doing it for the "wrong" reasons… why would I fight to do it for the "right" reasons.

The idea that the Oscars are somehow "right" is absurd. In the last five years, I don't think that the Best Picture winner has been in my Top Five. And I am always thrilled when a Traffic or Thin Red Line or The Insider sneaks in… and I always know they will not win.

Jeff keeps referring to Inside.com's Inside Line as though it had any more legitimacy than the non-betting Vegas line. Sometimes, when trying to make a point, Jeff scrapes the bottom of the barrel.

This has nothing to do with this list, but I do not consider myself to be in a feud with Jeff. He and I have personal and professional conflicts. And he can be, privately, amazingly unkind and abusive at times. But regulars of both of our columns will notice that I rarely mention him anymore because I do not consider him my opposite number. I consider Jeff to have a whole different area code.

Ang Lee and Ridley Scott both delivered masterful jobs as directors. I rate both of Soderbergh's 2000 movies over theirs. But what is the award for? If it is purely for directing skill, Scott should win. If it is for breaking new ground, Lee should win. If it is for doing amazing work with actors, using the camera and other filmmaking techniques and making the best movies, Soderbergh should win for either film. But since when did I get to define these things for the Academy?

Many people sincerely like Erin Brockovich more than they like Traffic. Just because Jeff feels otherwise, doesn't make everyone who feels differently wrong.

One major critic wrote Jeff back to say that they didn't feel it was an appropriate role for a critic to, essentially, root for one particular person to win. At least, not publicly. The same critic does make annual suggestions of whom they would like to see nominated… shaky line. But with five nominees, it seems fair to say that there is more than one reasonable answer in every category. Perhaps the voters will miss all the good ones. But as I wrote above, picking Soderbergh over Lee with a fervor that suggests that a Lee win would be misguided… that's somewhat misguided, isn't it?

READER OF THE DAY: Ft. Geek writes: "Let's face it, when the guys from Earnest & Young get through looking at all of the hanging chads, pregnant chads, and guys named Chad, the winner of the Best Director come Oscar night will be Ang Lee. Stephen Soderberg will have his day, and his achievement of two nominations will be a stepping stone to greatness. But when it just gets down to the nitty gritty, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon is the best film of 2000 and will acknowledged as such on March 25th."

And D-Sick (sorry for the terrible tag) writes: "Could you please explain why you thought CTHD is such a groundbreaking picture? Seriously.

My wife and I went to see it in a packed house last Sunday. We were both looking forward to it eagerly and came out of it bored to tears. If there's any innovation there, we (and a good portion of the audience we saw it with) didn't see it.

We both thought the characters were ciphers, and weren't even all that impressed by the stunts and effects. Am I just overlooking the painfully obvious, or what?

E ME: I guess I should pronounce one letter right and one wrong… but I wouldn't dream of it. Someone out there hates Citizen Kane and someone else loves The Next Best Thing. It's my job to write about how I feel in an honest and, hopefully, insightful way. I'm not here to tell you how to feel… even if it feels that way sometimes.

CTHD mixes genres, language, passion, lust, honor and death together in a way I consider magical. As a movie, it has broken through the limitations of being in a language other than English without having the kind of overt hook that a movie like Life Is Beautiful had. More, kids are going to see it… kids who have long refused to watch any foreign-language films that were not anime'. CTHD is making moviegoing more international and I consider that very, very good.

But then again… what do the rest of you think?