April 1, 2003

TEN THINGS I KNOW

1. In an effort to simplify the Oscar campaigning that so marred this year’s Oscars, there is a proposal being floated in the Academy to limit campaign spending to $1 for every dollar brought in at the box office. So, if a studio went for a limited release campaign, their advertising would be limited to matching the actual box office dollars. This way, financial flops will be eliminated from competition before they waste any additional marketing dollars. Also, in an effort to combat the piracy issues coming from the Academy screeners for all the competing films, the Academy is considering forcing interested candidates to show their films on a special cable/DirecTV channel assigned specifically set for the nominations process. The Academy would ask members not to tape or Tivo the broadcasts, so there would be no piracy problems.

2. Fresh off of the success of Chicago, Zadan and Meron will produce a movie version of the Broadway musical version of Singin’ In The Rain. They are having preliminary conversations with Charlie Sheen for the Gene Kelly role. Turns out that Sheen starred in numerous high school musical productions and once appeared as 3rd T-Bird in a touring company of Grease 2. For the Donald O’Connor role, they are talking to Alan Cumming, with an eye towards making the role gay, a la Will & Grace. For the Debbie Reynolds part, they are thinking about Kerry Zellweger, Renee’s rarely seen little sister. And in the director’s chair, it is between Scooby Doo director Raja Gosnell and McG, whose scheduling window may close if he gets the Superman job.

3. Speaking of Superman, the studio is continuing casting without a director at the helm. In the last 10 days since Brett Ratner fell out, they have met with and tested Laker forward Rick Fox, American Idol star Justin Guarini, Spider-Man side-villain James Franco and Dick Smothers, Jr. The search for a director continues with My Big Fat Greek Wedding director Joel Zwick in serious contention, along with The Tuxedo director Kevin Donavan. The effort to reduce the budget has led to a lot of internal debate at the studio, with Alan Horn pushing to remove “the flying stuff” and producer Jon Peters demanding that JJ Abrams remove all the musical numbers from the screenplay.

4. Universal Pictures is abuzz with word that the studio will demand a $1 increase in ticket prices on opening weekend when The Hulk finally unspools this summer. It seems that they feel that can increase box office by as much as $20 million with this tactic, with the film’s tracking going so well that “no one will give a damn about a stupid dollar.” The move comes after weeks of rumors that Fox would demand a $.50 premium on tickets for X-Men 2 that could be refunded if moviegoers bought a large soda and a box of Jujyfruits.

5. Michael Ovitz is poised to make big news again. GQ’s June issue, due on stands next week, will feature an interview with the former “most powerful man in Hollywood: in which he blames women over the age of 40 for his demise. He calls them “The Lipstick Mafia” and that they are worse than the gay mafia because their taste is not nearly as good. He also claims that these women roll over and go to sleep without snuggling. When asked why he doesn’t blame the Jews, he claims, “It’s been done.”

6. Ain’t It Cool News is about to announce a new movie production deal, co-financed by Miramax and New Line. The deal calls for the company to develop up to six titles a year, with as many as three likely to be greenlit. The deal specifically specifies that only two of the projects can be written by Ain’t It Cool associates, though as has been pointed out, who knows who they really are, given their clever nicknames? Speaking for AICN in Harry’s absence (he’s in South Korea on the set of Spy Kids 4: Goin’ Nuclear), site representative Bung Hole Joe aid, “Ain’t it cool? It rocks! I’m so excited, I’ve wet my adult diaper!”

7. After the surprise success of Y tu Mama Tambien, IFC Films has announced the sequel, Y tu Mama Tambien Dos. The film, to be directed by Roger Avary, will follow two young girls who explore their sexuality with an older man. The studio is hoping to get Harrison Ford for the male lead opposite Hilary Duff and Amanda Bynes. It’s not completely clear whether the film will be released in an R rated version or whether it will go out unrated. WB execs are worried that the unrated version will expose Amanda’s “special” tattoo. IFC wants everyone to know that that rumor about Roman Polanski’s involvement is a malicious lie.

8. The new story out of the Vivendi-Universal saga is that Barry Diller and Philip Anchutz will buy Universal Entertainment, DreamWorks, Artisan, the UA division of MGM/UA and NBC in an effort to build the world’s largest media player. In for a significant chunk of the financing will be the Shaw Bros., best known for the kung-fu films of the 70s, but who are now fronting for the Chinese government. In response, Michael Eisner is hinting that he will start merger negotiations with Rupert Murdoch and Saudi Arabia.

9. Jerry Bruckheimer and Michael Bay are about to announce their next collaboration. Code-named “Whose Your Daddy?” The film will take place on Mars. In order to make the film as realistic as possible, Bruckheimer will rent and flatten a small town in Southwest Arizona, shipping in millions of pounds of red dust to create the landscape. In a casting coup, Bay has brought together the entire cast and crew of John Frankenheimer’s last feature, Reindeer Games, to be in this film, including Ben Affleck, who has sworn never to work with Bay again. For his trouble, Affleck will receive a career-high $30 million and a trained “licking dog” so that everyone on the set can get a rest. The film is going to be 100 percent improvised and shot, in a Bay first, on digital video. Columbia Pictures will distribute domestically and split foreign with Paramount, MGM and Pathe, while Miramax will handle the Oscar campaign, currently budgeted at $75 million. The entire project is expected to cost no more than $238 million if they remain on schedule.

10. It’s April Fools Day. But you knew that already, right?

E ME: What “story” did I miss?