May 29, 2003

Did you realize that God lived only in Buffalo?

It explains a lot about Bruce Almighty’s screenplay.  Bruce never leaves Buffalo, despite having the powers of God, because Buffalo must be heaven.  Never mind that I know many people who would leave Buffalo if they had the power of a working car, much less the power of God.  Wednesday, Universal told Rocky Mountain News  that 776-2323, the number that flashes on Bruce’s pager repeatedly in the film, is not a working number in Buffalo.  Maybe a 716 as a prefix would have helped. 

SPEAKING OF UNIVERSAL… BusinessWeek’s Ron Grover has relaunched  the idea that Jeff Katenzberg and DreamWorks will end up becoming a part of Universal, with the DreamWorks management team taking control of the parent film studio. 

The future of Universal Studios keeps being positioned by parent Vivendi as a summer activity, more Hulk than American Wedding… but most likely a bumbling Rowan Atkinson comedy.  The DreamWorks idea is interesting, but flawed in that it would dump the current production team, which has become one of the town’s best in recent years.  Before you poo-poo that thought – and I am sure than some of you will – think about it.  What studio’s line-up would you prefer over the past three years?  And don’t just throw grosses at me.  Look at the net… domestic, foreign, video/DVD, ancillaries.  Pick the big franchise movie of your choice to hang onto, but release in and release out… Universal is right up there.

Besides, Universal will release at least 15 movies this year while DreamWorks releases between 5 and 7.   DreamWorks looks likely to have a grand total of zero $100 million movies this year.  Universal seems sure to release three in a row, starting with Bruce Almighty.  So who should be running whom?

Most people see the Malone bid as the Diller bid at this point.  The bid from Marvin Davis seems to have lost some steam… since if it were happening, you would have expected it to happen already.  The Edgar, Jr. bid has caused more laughter than calculation. 

And so, my ongoing question remains… if Katzenberg were to take over at Universal, where would Team Snider go?  Paramount?  Columbia?  MGM?  Could Team Snider become the next Imagine/Scott Rudin/Joel Silver/Revolution for one of the above? 

The mind boggles.

RUMOR MILL:  I am kind of stuck.  There is a long-standing rumor that is beginning to develop some serious evidence on its behalf.  If I report this rumor, I would be the first responsible outlet to do so.  If I sit on it, I may end up with a big plate of crow to eat by summer’s end.  I still want more evidence than I have.  But heavy lies the scum.

STUPID GOSSIP:  Page Six reported today that Aria, a readily available, high-profile, opera anthology flick has been “rediscovered” by a filmmaker associated with The Met, who discovered that Liz Hurley’s breasts are on display.  Please!  The film, which does offer a naked, still eyebrow-y Elizabeth Hurley, also offers a naked Bridget Fonda, Theresa Russell as a man, one of Tilda Swinton’s first film appearances and a pre-lesbian Sophie Ward.  Beresford directed the Hurley segment, but we are talking about a film with contributions from Altman, Jean-Luc Godard, Derek Jarman, Nic Roeg, Julien Temple and Ken Russell. 

QUESTION:  Is this LA Times writer writing a THB item?  It’s true… anyone who would compare Alicia Silverstone and Reese Witherspoon in any way at a cocktail party has put back a few too many drinks.  (Alicia = Tara Reid without the drugs… Reese = Blonde Sandra Bullock with more range.)  But as I read the piece, I tried to remember when I wrote it and why I was using Jim Brooks as a pseudonym when I know full well that there’s only room for one Jim Brooks in this town.  

IRRELEVANT:  What is the most irrelevant box office statistic in a world of irrelevant box office stats these days?  Annual market share.  The only company that cares about such things is Sony and that is only because the Japanese would rather have, traditionally, market share than profit.  We don’t live in a tentpole world anymore.  Studios are great when they have hits and crap when they have flops and the two may be only weeks separated.  Touting annual market share is like a guy boasting that he has all the great looking women because he pays for the most expensive whores.   Does that mean that any studio would not like a Spider-Man or a Matrix Reloaded?  Of course not.  But grossing the most overall is not much of a measure of anything.

SURPRISE:  The DVD sales for Antwone Fisher, over 1 million in week one, are a success for Fox Searchlight, but also have to be seen as vexing.  Between sale and rental, the title grossed $26 million, $5 million more than the film grossed in theaters.  The audience was there. But they just didn’t show up.  Frustrating. 

READER OF THE DAY:  RC, NOT THE COLA writes:  “In your column on Wednesday you said "Cannes sucked, big time."

I was there and have to disagree with you. I think those who are complaining about the lack of "big names" or "interesting" films are actually bemoaning something else -- the lack of big Hollywood pictures. We have become so accustomed to American product being placed centre stage and Hollywood types garnering all the headlines, that we have forgotten that there are really good movies being made by people who aren't household names in Idaho. I saw a film called "Kitchen Stories" by director Norwegian Bent Hamer that is not only really smart, but also really funny; the Canadian film called "The Barbarian Invasions" which is a monument to pathos -- both heartbreakingly sad and very funny -- and the darkly adventurous "The Mother" from director Roger Michell. For those who love film, each of these movies was worth the price of the plane ticket to get there, but none of them star people who are even close to being household names in North America.

I fear that The Hot Button's opinion of the festival is too jingoistic, and based purely on the idea that if there wasn't a great deal of mainstream American product represented at Cannes than it is a bad year. Yes, it might not have been as exciting a year as last year when Roman Polanski's "The Pianist" blew us all away on the last day, or "Bowling for Columbine" seemed like an incendiary documentary, but it was a year that saw really solid filmmaking take a center stage.

Let's not forget that there is a whole other world outside of Hollywood... and while these films may not gross in the hundreds of millions, or even the millions, they are still good films.”

E ME:  Jingoistic, no.  But based on the opinions of a lot of Americans, yes.  And it may be unfair.  The word on the Michell picture, for instance, is not great.  And he had some fans coming off of Changing Lanes.  But there is something to the argument that Hollywood = Perception of Success For Cannes.  But it’s not my doing.  Any festival worth its oats needs to have a reason for existence other than the fact that people are used to going there.  What is Cannes now, other than a hype op?  Is it really one of the best festivals in the world for quality film viewing anymore?  P.S. I am really hoping that Ginger Snaps II & III are good.  Go Canada!